Everyday While I spend approx 70 to 80 minutes behind the wheel, on my way from home to work. I feel lost in the traffic, work and life and imagine I could have done better and I deserve better and I could have been somewhere else. I should have been somewhere else.
These are just daily repetitive repeated fleeting thoughts of no consequence.
Every stretch of the 26km drive to work through the city has its own different calling. theme of the city flavour of the city call it whatever. From crossing the river on a toll road at 100 KMPH to 1kmph in 1st gear to exit the same toll road.
The entire stretch of the dark side of the city visible marked in particular with the top of the lotus temple in the centre, and its not an irony. It's plain reality.
Crossing the replica of the shanti stupa is a reminder that peace is inside you. Don't waste time searching for it.
Crossing the bhairo temple reminds me that it's ok to be drunk in the morning. What you can do in the night can be done during the day.
Crossing the Supreme Court and the supposedly orderly chaos outside with all the red beacon ambassadors and the three pointed stars and the four inter twined circles and everything mean nothing to justice. But they come to deliver and receive or delay justice in it.
Inevitably I do have to stop at the red light at barakhamba road which reminds me of the Delhiites dream of schooling their children in "Modern school".
CP is nothing but a circle of everything in life which one has to exit.
I pass the crematorium everyday, reminds me that the resting ground is not far away and you don't have to walk or drive yourself there.
The pigeon feeding point always makes me want to stop and click a few moments of hundreds of pigeons in flight taking off and landing without bumping into each other. I take imaginary shots with my mind and no memory stick. It's a daily opportunity missed thanks to the traffic around the roundabout. But I never miss the lady seated on the divider with her prayer book, praying and turning the pages. I am positive she is not lost. She might have lost her mind but she is surely not lost.
It's this last stretch and the feeling of being lost that brings me back to reality with lone physically blind humans walking with their sticks constantly on the move negotiating what they can't see and still being in control of where they want to go. They are daily reminders to me that lack of sight does not mean lack of vision and direction. They step out everyday for their mission of whatever it is , not knowing who will help them cross the road but they have the belief that when they will reach that point some one will stop and help them cross the road. The same road that I have difficulty in negotiating behind the wheel and feeling lost despite being blessed with sight and vision and all basic faculties. The day begins.
